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High Cost of Being Jewish II
Last issue I wrote about the high dollar cost of the Jewish
community’s religious, educational and community programs. I said committees
that judge a family’s financial ability and offer fee reductions were demeaning
and prevented people, especially kids, from full community participation. The
resulting mountain of mail proved that I touched a sensitive nerve. It revealed
a wide range of feelings and, I must say, a lot of good will.
A rabbi wrote emphasizing the importance of religious and social programs and
functions, all of which require funding:
“How shall we survive without money? How is one to pay the professionals who
dedicate their lives to the Jewish People; how to support the structures, afford
books, salaries, and honoraria for guest lecturers; pay for phones and electric
and programming, etc? Alas, there is no free lunch. It’s expensive to be a Jew.
Yet there is money for lots of other things — more than ever before. What are
our priorities? It is not a simple issue. But who said life was supposed to be
simple? So we struggle along and do the best we can and hope people will
understand and help.”
A former temple president wrote emphasizing the lay leadership’s concern about
balancing the budget: “Having been president of my temple, I saw many shnorrers.
We didn’t sell or assign seats for the holidays, but the first to arrive always
seemed to be the non-contributors. During my administration, we set low minimum
dues with a request for a donation to help cover those who were not able to pay.
We included anyone who came and wanted to be a member, without question.”
“Then on the first Rosh Hashanah in our newly remodeled building, I did not give
an aliyah to a very comfortable businessman who had paid no dues for the
previous two years though he had offered in-kind material for our new building,
which somehow never arrived. His wife and son went ballistic about ‘Harold’s
traditional aliyah. The following Monday, Harold stormed into my office, tossed
a $500 check on my desk, said his secretary messed up, and shouted ‘screw your
aliyah.’ It’s hard to run a Jewish organization!”
The shnorrer factor depends upon where you sit, at least according to one
reader: “Too often, a person or family going through financial hardship for
whatever reason, can be made to feel like shnorrers if they ask for help from
their fellow Jews.”
People carry pain for a long time over negative experiences: “Forty years ago I
wanted to enroll my son for Bar Mitzvah in a nearby temple. He would have
learned quickly, as now he is a tenured university science professor. At the
time, however, I couldn’t afford the very high fee. The temple would not scale
it down. So — he was never Bar Mitzvahed. I never forgot it.”
For another reader, the committee process did not leave a bad taste: “I remember
my mother going to the JCC to ask for scholarships for us children to go to
summer camp. Somehow, my parents carried it off without any loss of dignity and
even we [children] weren’t ashamed, but this is only the exception that proves
the rule you describe so clearly.”
And here is a reader who adds another dimension: “We have one child in college
and two in a Jewish day school. Even with both of us working hard, paying three
tuitions really straps us. We would like to send the little ones to some of the
JCC activities and/or to Jewish summer camp. We just can’t do it. Too bad, I
know these organizations need funds to operate. It’s a tough problem.”
My brother Bill, a businessman, says, “You can see this as an unsolvable problem
or as an opportunity.” He is right. We, as a community, have an opportunity to
insure that every child, regardless of their parents’ financial condition, and
without well-intentioned but demeaning committees, has access to a full range of
Jewish community programs.
I am asking you, dear readers, for your ideas, and I will make certain they get
to those in a position to affect change.
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