It never ceases to amaze me how highly educated men in their 50s can be so “uneducated” when it comes to women. You would think that, by now, they would know how to approach and treat a woman, but a recent dating experience tells me otherwise.

A seemingly brilliant man contacted me through JDate. He has a Ph.D. in Physics from Columbia University and is an inventor and patent attorney. On his JDate profile, he had indicated that his only relationship goal was “marriage” and, in one of his essays, he noted that he had been divorced for 10 years, had had several “serious relationships,” and would like to get remarried. He lives in Beverly Hills, but offered to brave the 405, 22, and 5 just to meet me. This certainly sounded promising.

After a 2 1/2-hour drive (and this was mid-morning on a Wednesday!), during which he called me several times to give me his ETA, he arrived. That’s when I got to see that “educated” does not mean “smart.” On his profile, he had described himself as “firmed and toned.” So when he walked in, sporting a large stomach, I wondered whether that was the “firmed and toned” part of him. I could live with the gut, but his deception was hard to “digest.”

I like a man who takes care of himself and his possessions. I’d rather be with someone who has a well maintained “sensible” car than a fancy schmancy one that hasn’t been cleaned in a while—a long while. I couldn’t help but notice that his luxury SUV was dented and dirty on the outside and grungy on the inside. “Grungy” is not a word that I expected to use in regard to a man in his 50s.

Trying to put a positive spin on all this, I rationalized that, by spending time inventing such things as a device that both detects and removes formerly imperceptible tumors in children, he was too busy to be concerned about staying in shape or taking care of his car. But that only took me so far.

At lunch, he talked nearly non-stop about his career in physics and law. I was interested, but to a point. I wanted to know who he was beyond his achievements in both fields. So I politely interrupted him to ask him what he does for fun. He had to think about it for a moment, but then said that he likes to run at the beach and spend time with his adult children. Fair enough.

At the end of lunch, he asked me whether I would like to take a walk, adding that he didn’t really know much about me. Well, how could he? He didn’t give me an opportunity to speak. Giving him the benefit of the doubt, I thought that the walk was intended for him to get to know what I’m about. But, as I found out, he had other ideas about how to get to know a woman.

It was a workday, and I was very busy. So I said that, although I was enjoying his company (okay, a bit of a white lie, but I was still hoping that it could become a self-fulfilling prophecy), I needed to get back to my work. He said, “That’s okay. I didn’t think that I’d be able to get you into [a certain piece of furniture] within the next half-hour, anyway.” Surely, he must have been kidding.

When we returned to my house, he offered to walk me to the door. But being eager to get back to my work, I nicely declined. He reached over to give me what I thought was going to be a hug, only to find myself the recipient of a forced kiss, a la the country that brought us “freedom fries.” And if that wasn’t enough, as I turned to get out of the car, he engaged in a rather “lizard-like” behavior with my left ear. It seems that he meant what he said at lunch.

You would think that, with his brilliant mind, he could figure out how to treat a woman. But I guess not. They don’t teach that in school.