Let me first wish all of you in the Megillah family a very happy and healthy new year. It has been my privilege to be able to present my opinions to you in our monthly newsletter. Thanks especially to Michael and Arnold for their understanding and for allowing me the latitude they have extended me.

Much has happened in the two months since my last column. Space prohibits a detailed or even a general exploration of all those events, so I’ll try to hit the visceral high points, and keep this short and sweet.

The aftermath of the disastrous hurricanes of the past months have focused attention on the various problems of poverty and governmental incompetence like no column of mine ever could. Last year we sat and watched as a bi-partisan commission made recommendations regarding our readiness to respond to overwhelming disasters, and watched further as these recommendations were lauded by our government. We were promised swift and comprehensive action on this advice by an administration with a record of mendacity and stupidity like none other. Still, we could hope.

What we got was a mayor who told the truth, for one day at least. Mayor Ray Nagin of New Orleans, in the thick of a life and death battle, told the Federal Government to “Get off their asses, and get down here and take care of the worst goddamn disaster in the history of the country.” When I heard his statement, I was ready to promote him for president.

He then fell on his face.

The day Bush showed up, both he and Governor Blanco rolled over and played dead. They couldn’t seem to heap enough praise on the fool. I wondered what had happened to change their minds. No way to know for sure, is there? We can only imagine.

So let’s imagine.

Consigliore Karl Rove calls Blanco, tells her that plenty of cash is on the way; contracts with limited or no bidding required, a whole lot of private and public cash to be split and disbursed at his, Rove’s, discretion.

A word to the wise, I suppose.

Blanco’s eyes lose their moist, deer in the headlights aspect of the first week or so of the disaster, and begin to focus. She calls Nagin. He regrets telling the truth is such vivid terms; dear me, whatever could he have been thinking? I mean, our president isn’t such a bad fellow, is he? (Insert a video clip of Tony Soprano lighting up a cigar as he leans back in a garden chair).

Tom Hagen couldn’t have spoken to Woltz more persuasively than Rove to Blanco. Or with more success. As for Nagin, I no longer support your bid for the presidency!

Of course, this is all mere speculation and fantasy.

Isn’t it?

On another subject, I fail to see what all the uproar is over Bush’s recent court appointments. Who did you think he was going to appoint, Al Sharpton or Ted Kennedy? We have a government whose three branches are dominated by a single party, and an opposition party in name only. Has anyone heard from the Democrats lately? I mean, people are dying and all…

Fuggetaboutit! All that is left for folks with any degree of sense is the writing of increasingly shrill columns and hoping that the mid-term elections will result in gains for the opposition, such as it is. Failing that, we can simply exercise the sole option left to us:

Bend over and grab your ankles, there’s more of the same on the way…

As always, thank you for your indulgence, and I welcome any and all comments.