A young man asked a rabbi, "What is Talmud?"
"Consider two men who climb inside a chimney," said the rabbi. "One comes out clean, and the other comes out dirty. Which man washes himself?"
"I'm not sure," admitted the young man.
"The clean one washes," said the rabbi, "because he sees the dirty man, and thinks he must be dirty, too, whereas the dirty man sees the clean one, and thinks that he, too, must be clean. Now, two men climb inside a chimney. One comes out clean, and the other dirty. Which one washes?"
"The clean one," answered the young man. You just told me so.
"The dirty one washes," replied the rabbi. Each man looks at himself. The clean one sees that he is clean, the dirty one sees that he is dirty, and the dirty one washes. Now, two men climb inside a chimney. One comes out clean, and the other dirty. Which one washes?"
"I guess it could be either one," said the young man.
"They both wash," replied the rabbi. "It is impossible that a man should climb inside a chimney and come out clean."
"Now wait a minute," challenged the young man. "You have just given me three contradictory answers to the same question. That's impossible!"
"No," said the rabbi. "That's Talmud."