My wife Arlene and I decided to write our
Chanukah cards early, so she went to the post office to pick up stamps. She came
back looking confused; I asked “Any problems dear?” She responded to
my query with, “I asked the clerk for postage stamps for sending out my Chanukah
cards and the clerk asked “What denominations?”, so I told him 12 Orthodox, 10
Conservative and 25 Reform”.
Chag Samayach. I love
this time of year. Chanukah brings back such fond memories for me. I marvel
at how the celebration has changed since I was a child.
In my youth we lived in Brooklyn,
New York in a 4 story walk up. I always enjoyed celebrating Chanukah
lighting the candles, eating latkes, playing dreidel, and singing the
Chanukah songs. My parents gave us hazel nuts which we used instead of
money for betting in the driedel game; of course it was always fun cracking them
open and eating that wonderful round little nut as well.
My aunts and uncles would visit
and bring us Chanukah candy “gelt”, kosher chocolates which came
from Baricini or Barton’s. I would also get one toy from my parents. I
always enjoyed listening to my Dad tell the story of Chanukah. He’d get
excited telling how a small remnant of righteous, Torah observant men, with
inspiration and love for G-d, defeated the Syrian Greeks and restored the Temple
and Israel to a Torah observant nation. His eyes would light up as he
told of the miracle of the oil; little did I know then that he was handing
the tradition down to his sons; my older brother and me.
When I try to remember those days
of my childhood in greater detail, one incident in particular stands out in
my mind. My brother Herb once asked for a train as a gift. Our parents,
being European immigrants, took him on a subway ride. I remember him
crying; they didn’t know what he really wanted. They never saw a child's
miniature train set. He’s 72 years old now and I think I’ll see that he gets the
train set this year!
Living in a Jewish neighborhood
meant that the majority of the households would have a menorah shining
in a window. How exciting to see them all shining brightly and regally,
especially on the last day of Chanukah when all the candles and bulbs were
lit. As I looked up I’d see one or two homes shining with Christmas
lights. I knew they practiced a different religion but it was never spoken of in
our home.
When I turned ten, we moved to
Flushing, Queens, New York, and the kids in the neighborhood weren’t named
Moshe, Yankel, or Vellville, but more like Mike, Joey or Jimmy. These children
weren’t Jewish, but they were great friends and we all played the same
games, and laughed and cried together. Occasionally someone would
call me “Jewboy” but it was usually an adult; the kids didn’t seem to care and
the remark would be quickly forgotten.
When Chanukah came around again
my Dad was still as joyful as he had ever been. He’d tell the same story
and he’d place the Menorah in the window. When I stood outside our home I
noticed there were many more Christmas lights than Menorahs. Till then, I
thought the whole world was Jewish. What an awakening; this was to change my
life forever. I had just joined the real world in America. Some of the
non-Jewish kids were surprised to see a Menorah because they began asking me why
we were lighting candles and why we didn’t celebrate Christmas. I shared
the story of Chanukah with them and how we celebrated for 8 days. They started
telling me about Christmas and about the presents they’d receive. When I
told my parents about all the presents the gentile children get, my
Mom said “Sweetheart, don’t worry, I promise you’ll have a present for every
night of Chanukah”. Evidently this went on in many Jewish households, as
Jewish parents wanted their children to feel just as privileged as non-Jewish
children were. Eight presents seems to have replaced the one simple gift on a
festive holiday, which Chanukah is compared to our more sacred holy days
and holidays.
Years later, married and
with children, and living on Long Island, my wife and I passed on the
traditions. Celebrations were much different than when I was a child, and
the houses around us were lit up like the fourth of July. Our sons learned
the story well, and knew what to expect at Chanukah. We had two menorahs
in the house, one held wax candles, and the other held light bulbs that
we’d place in the window. We played dreidel, and real money had replaced the
hazel nuts. The gifts would be wrapped in blue and silver paper, and piled high
in the living room, and each day each child would choose one gift. I would
listen to my son's reply when asked." you a Christmas or a Chanukah?" (they were
not knowledgeable enough yet to say Jewish or Christian) “We’re a Chanukah, and
we get presents for 8 days,” was their answer.
Celebrating the Jewish holidays,
and retelling the stories, and observing traditions that accompany them have
helped us strengthen our Jewish identity. Of course much of our traditions
can be found in the food that unites us. Today Chanukah is more festive
because our family has grown, and expanded. Our children, and their
families, all participate, and now I’m the joyful one telling the story of the
Maccabees while getting excited as I tell of the miracle. It’s a celebration
lighting candles, singing songs, eating latkes, and jelly donuts. We
exchange gifts, hug, laugh and light the menorah.
Unlike the celebrations when I
was a child, today we also celebrate in the Synagogue. We have a potluck
luncheon with dreidels for the children, and a large
table where all the families light the Hanukkias they've
brought from home together. It’s a very powerful moment as we
all chant the blessings together, and see smiling faces as everything
glows. It reminds us too, that we are to be a light for all nations.
The Rabbi will hand out chocolate Chanukah gelt to the children and of course
pronounce many blessings over them. We eat together the latkes and foods people
have brought.
One year the Rabbi’s
face was carved in chopped liver (as we often hear the
Jewish expression…”What am I chopped liver?”)
Today much has been
added to the way we celebrate the holiday. Menorahs come in different
shapes, and forms from the very small to huge. We used to make our own
cards but today it’s mainstream, they can be purchased at Hallmark,
Wal-Mart or online. Retail stores sell Chanukah, as well as Christmas
decorations. I hear children talking about Chanukah Harry, or Latke Larry
bringing them gifts.
Yes, the holiday celebration is
different than when I was a child. So much so that I said to my
beautiful wife Arlene “Dear, this year maybe we should give the children hazel
nuts to use when they play dreidel.”
Have a Happy Chanukah!!! I wish
you all the joy, and the peace of this season. Eat Kosher,
Mel (The Fat
Guy)