8/3/2004
Issue: 5.08
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Hi Gang, and greetings from Hollywood!

Well, I guess we all survived the overeating and pyromania of Independence Day. Yours truly is writing this from high atop his treadmill, trying to shed the pounds of hamburgers and potato salad!

Sadness opens this month’s column yet again, with the passing of two show business icons. Isabel Sanford, best known as Louise “Weezy” Jefferson, died of what sources describe as ‘old age’ at the age of 86. Sanford first gained recognition on an episode of “Bewitched” as a ‘Mammy’ styled character opposite Elizabeth Montgomery and the late Jack Cassidy. Also noteworthy, Sanford was the first ever black actress to win the coveted “Best Performance in a comedy Role” Emmy for her portrayal of Louise Jefferson, the long suffering, strong willed wife of ever-pretending George. Interestingly, Sanford was 20 years older than her onscreen husband, played by Sherman Hemsley.

Also farblondzet, Marlon Brando, whose portrayal of the big-hearted/cold blooded Don Vito Corleone (no relation, I promise you,) in the 1973 Gangster flick “The Godfather” died in his Beverly Hills home of emphysema and pneumonia. The 80 year-old actor had recently completed voice-over work for the upcoming Brendan Fraser film, “Big Bug Man”, as, of all things, an elderly woman. For health reasons, Brando did the work from his home, in full drag, and munching on Persian Caviar and wine, gifts from the director. Oddly, the corpulent film legend had always wanted to play a woman, a strange, but somehow endearing way for the man who redefined method acting to end a long illustrious career!

Oscar-winning composer Jerry Goldsmith died from cancer at his Beverly Hills home at the age of 75. Goldsmith’s name was synonymous with film and television ‘themes’, having written musical scores for “Star Trek”, “Dr. Kildare”, and “Barnaby Jones”, as well as many film scores such as “Planet of the Apes” ( reportedly, while conducting the orchestra for the recording of it, Goldsmith wore a full gorilla prosthetic mask and make-up,) and most recently, “Looney Tunes: Back in Action!” Goldsmith was nominated for the ‘Oscar’ 17 times, and finally won for his musical contribution to the 1976 film, “The Omen”.

Lastly, actor Eric Douglas, son of Academy Award winning legend Kirk, was found dead in his New York City Apartment, from a drug overdose. The aspiring actor had achieved some success in the 80s, appearing in “Delta Force 3 The Killing Game” and an episode of HBO’s “Tales from the Crypt” for which he earned an Emmy nomination, playing opposite his Father. Douglas has been in and out of prison and rehab for years, because (according to sources,) he was never able to attain the level of stardom his father and older brother Michael had. Eric Douglas was 46 years old.

Meanwhile, sad news for James “Scotty” Doohan, the actor who has become immortalized as the ever put upon chief engineer of the original starship Enterprise, has been diagnosed with the onset of Alzheimer’s disease. The 84 year-old actor also suffers from Parkinson’s disease, Diabetes, and Fibroses, some of which were caused by chemicals he was exposed to during the D-Day invasion of France during the Second World War. But, ever the mensch, Doohan continues to work, appearing most recently in the upcoming “Skinwalker: Curse of the Shaman”, due for release in the fall.

Meanwhile, from the “Move over Anita Bryant” department, diet giant Unilever Inc., makers of Slim-Fast, have pulled their series of highly successful commercials featuring comedian Whoopi Goldberg. At a fund raiser for the John Kerry election campaign, she made sexually derogatory comments about George W. Bush, ( sources say she compared his last name to a part of the female anatomy,) and other remarks so inflammatory that the company decided Goldberg was too controversial for the apolitical diet drink’s ad campaign. Apparently, Whoopi had forgotten that big business and politics don’t mix, seemingly having lost sight of the fact that Anita Bryant’s anti-gay crusade in the 1970s cost her a multi-million dollar contract hawking Florida orange juice, a dismissal which began a permanent downward spiral of the star’s career. In a statement to the press, Goldberg said that, while she understood the company’s business position, she would not back down.

And did any of you catch that facatcta documentary on the Sci-Fi Channel called “The Buried Secret of M. Night Shaymalan?” Well, don’t get your gatkes farkrimpt yet Gang, because the whole thing is now suspected of having been a total hoax! According to my sources, Shaymalan may have collaborated with Sci-Fi Pres. Bonnie Hammer, as a way to publicize his new movie, “The Village!” The ‘Blair Witch’ styled farce may have been the biggest publicity stunt in the last fifty years, having garnered gezunte ratings for Sci-Fi, and giving Shaymalan’s new opus publicity that geldt can’t buy!

Meanwhile, Hollywood Legends George Lucas and Steven Speilberg keep finding reasons to put the eight-years-in-the-making fourth installment of the “Indy” series on hold. Scripts are rejected, storylines revamped, and Sean Connery and Harrison Ford keep aging. Some insiders are concerned at this point that the movie may never be made at all, due to the fact that Ford may be getting too old to do action films. ‘Fun-Foo’ maven Jackie Chan, at almost fifty has begun relying more and more on CGI for his stunts in his movies, and Harrison Ford, at sixty-four years old, may be unable to do the film. A few months ago, it was leaked that “The Mummy” star Brendan Fraser would be joining the cast of the fourth ‘Indy’ flick, but bailed soon after due to the snail’s pace of the production process.

And just in from the “Couldn’t you just plotz!” department, I just got back from a screening of the director’s cut of the film version of Andrew Lloyd Webber’s “Phantom”, scheduled for release in December, While Webber’s plays usually don’t translate to the big screen too well, (the only one I really thought captured the magic of the stage was the video version of “Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat,”) this one is absolutely cinematic Gan Eyden! Joel Schumacher did a superb job of bringing the maisse to the screen, and his use of second-string actors in the main roles was a mekheye. The art direction is sumptuous, as is the costuming, although a little dark for my taste. Still, it’s a tremendous piece of filmmaking, and a definite ‘must see’!

Well, that’s it for this month Gang…stay cool, stay happy!
 

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