Mother in Israel posted the most hysterical cleaning advice for this pre-Pesach season.

For the past month or two, I've been trying to make sure that my chametz inventory has gone down. This year it's particularly hard, since after stocking up on whole wheat noodles, and other carbohydrates, I started a diet, and discovered that I function best sans starch. If I see that I have too much left over, I'll start giving to neighbors. There are also neighbors here who collect unopened packages of chametz, sell it for Pesach, and then they donate the food to poor families.

Cleaning? Well, I wiped out some fridge shelves last week. OK, that's something good housekeepers do daily, or weekly, but I'm not a good housekeeper. My priority is clean food, on clean dishes. Nothing else counts, except clean laundry. And yes, the floors do get washed, toilets, too.

But about the windows, there was a defect in the design. We have double windows, the first in the yishuv, and the window guy made all his mistakes on us. The livingroom/diningroom ones can't be cleaned; it's that simple. And I also haven't found a way of eating from them, so if there's dirt, it's not chametz, and not even food. I've never seen a dog try to climb up, and lick them. According to Jewish Law, that's the test. I once asked Awol, who was our family dog, when I was becoming religious to try my blush-on. One sniff, and she avoided it. It was sure an easier way to check it for Pesach than asking a rabbi.

Well, three weeks to go before Passover, and I can't imagine being ready already.