| Imagine spending several hours on a project: getting prettied up for a night
on the town, making a special meal, or hanging wallpaper. Someone else arrives,
and you ask them,
"How do you like it?"
"Do you want the truth?"
Oh, how you cringe, for those words almost invariably mean that the worst is
coming. Never mind that it is not possible for you to buy another dress, change
the menu, or choose a different color for the walls: someone is about to render
a negative judgment.
It is almost impossible to silence those who insist on inflicting their version
of the truth on others.
You may think to try an alternative approach and ask, "Isn't this a marvelous
dessert?"
"It's interesting," says the killjoy. Interesting has become the universal
euphemism for a bad review.
Perhaps, you have learned to enjoy things without requesting the opinion of
anyone else. Some folks just can't resist offering it anyway. People who choose
this approach usually give one small compliment followed by a list of suggested
improvements, or damning with faint praise.
Some critics pretend to be helpful. One example is the person who tells you that
there is a run in your stocking at a time when you can't do anything about it.
As a hostess, I have come to dread the sneaky meanie. This type interrupts a
group which is agreeing about something positive, and posits the opposite point
of view. The goal of this seems to be having what is politely called a spirited
discussion. Sneaky meanies like to excuse themselves later by wearing a grin and
saying that they enjoy playing devil's advocate.
The next phrase from a smile-squasher is often, "Sorry, just being honest."
The world would be much more pleasant without this plague of truth and honesty.
I can usually find chairs for extra guests at special dinners; all charming
liars are welcome.
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